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Feb 12

We need to start raising Money NOW!

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SEDS

This is shocking to say the least. I had no idea. Apparently this disease can strike any older adult, regardless of race, creed, color, or gender, at any time without warning. This is terrible.

Before you decide shrug this off as just another waste of time, just remember, it could happen to you; it could even, shudder, happen to me. And, there is no known cure.

Something must be done, and now! I’m thinking of starting a foundation to raise money and “Find a Cure;” or, at least have a nice office and a new SUV, maybe a Hummer (which I always thought was a blow job), until the clock ticks SEDS.

You can read the rest of the article here.


Feb 12

Another Bumper sticker, oh, boy.

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God Answers Knee-mail!

Is that cute, or what? Though, to be frank, or is it sally, I can’t figure out how God answers, or would want to answer, 20 million Knee-mails a day. Maybe, I should Knee-mail the question. I’ll let you know if I get an answer.

What does God consider spam? Will my question end up in the spam bucket?

Finally, does He/She, hmm, get sex enhancement Knee-mail?


Feb 09

Kill your Cell phone now, before it’s too late!

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Cell is Stephen King’s latest book written since his writing retirement. (I’m going to have to go back and read his retirement speech; I don’t understand how you can retire from writing and continue writing; maybe I misunderstood.)

On October 1st, at 3:03pm, in an unnumbered year, cell phones all over the world, or at least on the East Coast, ring, are answered, and the world as we know it ends. Those who answer are turned into slobbering, violent zombies. Those smart enough to not have a cell phone are survivors in an earthly hell that only Stephen King could build or describe.

This is a one note, or rather, a one ring, story that, amazingly works and holds together all the way through. Read it and stay away from your cell phone.

Also, among all the death and destruction, there is one really gratuitous death. Alice, a minor character seems to be taking over the story, to the annoyance, I think, of SK (assuming SK is the narrator), so, in order to put her back in her place, she gets a brick to the head which has the intended result.

You can also read it as an Audible book if you don’t want to read actual words. However, be aware that you will have a device that talks plugged into your ear. OOOH, scary.


Feb 09

The Geezer’s, The Granny’s, umm, no, it’s The Grammy’s

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U2 won best album of the year for How to dismantle an atomic bomb. What a crock; have you listened to this piece of shit album? It’s a bomb alright. Oops, can I use that word? The b word? This message will probably be snagged into a government database where it will mingle with other usless information.

Anyway, the album stinks; U2 stinks; Bonehead ought to go on his save the world tour and never return.

And Paul McCartney won for some more bad music.

And, Green Day, whose album is great by the way, won something for a 2 year old album.

I take it there isn’t anything new “under the sun?” I guess it’s time to throw away the iPod, or go on an eternal nostalgia tour.

Oh, yeah, System of a Down won something. How the hell did that happen? They aren’t 40+ years old so they shouldn’t qualify.

I’m glad I watched Lost instead; it makes more sense, and it doesn’t make any sense at all.


Feb 06

Stuper Bowl 40, or why did we watch this mess?

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The Stuper Bowl is 40 and yesterday showed its age.

The pregame show with Stevie Wonder would have been better if they hadn’t tried to cram every singer and dancer in Detroit onto one small stage and hadn’t told them to move in random, spastic patterns. And what was up with those 60’s wigs?

The singing of the national anthem was another mess, (the national anthem is always a mess, no one can sing it except the Dixie Chicks) with Aaron Neville doing something strange to it that is indescribable. Aretha Franklin should have done the whole song and Dr John should have had some keys on his piano; he might as well have not been there since you couldn’t hear him anyway. Nice hat though.

The first half of the game was OK; actually, it was sort of dull and only livened up by bad referee calls, and the stupid end of the half when Holmgrem called 2 or 3 really bad plays and then blamed his quarterback. Classy.

Half time was a bore. Does anyone really want to watch a bunch of old men dance and sing songs you heard 30, maybe 40, years ago? “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction” made more sense when the Stones didn’t make $160 million in a year. Give us a break. Go home. When the Rolling Stones have become safe enough for Stuper Bowl half time it’s time to retire. And, I read that the Stuper Bowl officials didn’t want anyone over 50 by the stage next to the Stones; too old, too ugly, too fat, too bald, might die right on the spot.

By the way, the game was in Motown; how come the half time theme wasn’t Motown?

The second half of the game consisted of 2 15 minute quarters for a total of 30 spread out over an hour and a half. There were a couple of good plays, but mostly it was sleep inducing.

Pittsburgh won, by the way. Seattle seemed to have decided, except for an interception, that the game ended at the half.

The advertisements this year reflected the mood of the country; they were boring and unimaginative except for the FedEx add and the almost pornographic Burger King ad.

The announcers were John Madden and Al Michaels and, thank God, NOT Phil Simms.

Next year, I think I will stay in bed, or just go outside and bash my head into a wall.


A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

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